Profile HollywoodOS™, the operating system of the stars! (vers. 1.0 alpha) Are you a gamma ray enhanced superhuman about to embark on a career as a caped crusader, a mad inventor with a doomsday machine bent on world domination, a member of a covert government organisation who exists in the shadowy world of international espionage or the last surviving member of an ancient race of mega evil, pan-dimensional hyper beings who's awaken from cryo sleep and is about to begin a reign of terror through-out the multiverse? If so you'll need a simple to use, reliable OS to handle all your computing needs. Whether you want a sentient super computer to act as your sidekick or just an interface your henchmen can understand without expensive retaining HollywoodOS™ is the answer! Call in at your local cinema any time for a demonstration. HollywoodOS™ Specifications Easy to use HollywoodOS™ is so simple to use that anyone can operate it without any training what so ever. Just run the installer and you're ready to start taking over the universe! Platform Normally used on Thinking Machine computers its system independent code can easily be recompiled to run on PCs, Macs, UNIX boxes, cell phones, wrist watches or something knocked-up from a pile of old circuit boards, car parts and discarded perspex sheets. Input Despite being a GUI (graphical user interface) the standard method of interacting with HollywoodOS™ is via the keyboard. It's amply supported by the patented MegaBuffer™ which can handle over 1000 key strokes per second, a must for the fingers-of-fury speed typing style preferred by the majority of our clients. For those on a higher budget the Spy/Child Genius/Alien/Mad Inventor plug-in interface modules add voice recognition and speech synthesis (droning "Stephen Hawkins" or Sexy Italian/French vixen options available). Output Visual output can be fed through anything from the holographic imaging suites in your low Earth orbit space station to the full colour miniature LCD display of your SpyWatch™. Our patented BleepBleepBleep™ sound system provides incessant audio feedback for all actions including pressing keys, selecting menu options, starting up, shutting down, inserting and ejecting media, formatting media, copying documents, deleting documents, scrolling documents and crashing. Compression The proprietary FitYouBastard™ compression codec means that 3 weeks worth of full screen, high definition video with NICAM digital surround sound can easily fit onto a single floppy disk. Speed Our world famous ShitOffAShovel™ bus technology ensures that your computer will be able to copy any file, no matter how large it may be, in about four seconds.* Security HollywoodOS™ offers cutting edge security features including fingerprint identification, heat signature recognition and retinal scanning which mean that your data really is for your eyes only!** Peripherals The UniversalConnectionCable™ renders HollywoodOS™ based computers instantly compatible with all standard PC add-ons, domestic appliances, military hardware and alien technology.*** Reliability The KeepItUp™ system software module guarantees that your computer will never, crash, lock-up or generate an error message.* Internet access HollywoodOS provides ultra-wide bandwidth Internet access. All movies playback in real time and files are downloaded instantly* so there are no tension stalling pauses. It will even generate a techno backing track for the montage sequence where you attempt to break into a maximum security government computer system. Optional extras Banks of flashing lights are the perfect way to create that retro look, great for maniacal sentient super computers plotting to take over the world and towering ancient alien technology alike! Why confine your mechanical brain to a dusty corner of your secret volcano base? Invest in a HollywoodOS™ compliant android and take your computing power on the road!****   * Except where essential to the plot. ** The security subroutines are currently being rewritten after reports of an obscure bug that enables teenagers to crack it's passcodes in a matter of seconds. *** UniversalConnectionCable™ sold separately. Not compatible with Amiga computers. **** Life insurance is strongly recommended as there is a 99.99999% possibility that the droid will go insane and attempt to dismember you. HollywoodOS is copyright © 2000 Brian Smith. All rights reserved. Additional technical specifications supplied by Ed Haynes.